(o_o)

...you ever get the feeling you were being....watched?

fnord

...A fish, a bottle of wine, and a bicycle.

If I had one piece of advice to dole out during a valedictorian speech (yea, that'll happen soon) it would be, "Don't discount surreal moments." Far too often, bizarre occurrences go overlooked due to the drudgery of everyday life. People simply don't have the time to see a cornucopia of truly hilarious scenes. A mentally distrubed man believing he's jesus christ singing about how much of a savior he is, portly children who wave to buildings expecting them to wave back, people who pick fights with inanimate objects, or even people who shout long streams of obscenities in "family establishments"...all fine examples...and all sadly overlooked. Why?
Perhaps those two horrid words "political correctness" have made us bland shells of our former selves so forever fearful of offending anyone that we IMMEDIATELY don blinders to anything (or anyone) out of the norm. I say screw that. Bankers and accountants lead "normal lives" and look how boring most of them are. The odd and misshapen masses should should be greeted with waves of cheers not a cold sholder and pocket change. Or maybe it's time for you, intrepid reader, to venture out and do something outlandish so we normal folk learn by example. Wear a large foam hat and shout passages written by your pet vole George, make ketchup packet animals, or whisper consipracy theories to your sandwich...your choice, but DO IT!!! DO IT!!!

...Damn...gotta stop eating sugar before bed.


Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can: all of them make me laugh.
W. H. Auden (1907 - 1973)

4:51

....okay....I know. Long time no update. I could offer the usual array of excuses or a few new ones, but I'll just get down to what's on my mind. Since my last post I've been thinking about life (a not-so-unusual 30 year old thing to do) and a general re-assessment of how mine's going. I guess thats why blogs and reality shows are so popular nowadays. For a small period of time you get to forget about your own life and peer into the trials and tribulations of someone you may never meet. Sort of a mini vacation if you will...but I'm going off on the wrong tangent.

Life. We're all far too concerned of the consequences and future events to actually enjoy it. Unless you're planning on robbing a bank or hurting someone mentally or physically I'd say f$#k consequences. If we didn't take a chance in life we never would have stepped out of that primordial ooze for fear of catching a cold. Take a different route home, ask that special person out for a drink, or even try out for some obscure sport you've always wanted to try. Just don't worry about the things that might happen because they haven't yet. At risk of sounding like a Hallmark card or after school special...don't worry about the future, enjoy the now.

I guess the same philosophy can be applied to past events too.

Far too often I've had to look back on something stupid I've done that if I could go back in time I'd do differently. These f#$ing retarded words should be stricken from everyone's vocabulary. Unless you're a character in a particular H.G.Wells story, there is no way you can change the past. So why fret over why you have that scar over your lip, or why you don't have that motorcycle you've always wanted. Learn from mistakes then move on. It'll save you lots of headaches, heartaches and beer money.

joe

Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.
Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (121 AD - 180 AD), Meditations, 200 A.D.